How to find Happiness and Fulfillment in 4 Steps

Throughout my journey of spiritual growth and finding my soulmate, I discovered I followed 4 steps to find happiness and fulfillment in my life.

Many single women out there (and I speak from personal experience) get caught up in ONLY finding the “right person”. As a result, when meeting someone the focus is dominated by what he has or doesn’t have, who he is, his personality traits, etc.

I personally found the “right person” who met all my requirements and even got engaged. However I noticed that deep inside I wasn’t 100% happy and fulfilled. As a result, I realized that what I was truly looking for was beyond finding the “right person”.

My first realization was to understand that the main reason WHY I wanted to find “my soulmate” was to find happiness and fulfillment which is in truth what I was seeking.

Like many single women I work with, if you really think about why you want to find the right person, your soulmate or your future husband, it’s because of the feeling you will feel after you find him. That feeling is in truth what you are looking for.

So what exactly is that for you? Is it companionship, security, being emotionally or financially stable, accomplishment, becoming a mother or something else?

Take time to really think and be clear about this because until you know this you are walking blind into relationships. If you don’t focus on the end goal you will never feel satisfied.

So let me share the 4 steps I followed to find 100% happiness and fulfillment:

Step #1: Know clearly what will make you happy and fulfilled.

Like everything else in life, a lack of direction and unclear goals are among the largest reasons why a project fails and the same goes for relationships.

If you don’t know exactly what is going to make you happy then no potential partner can know this for you and as a consequence, can’t provide it for you.

Step #2: Earn it!

Like my husband says there is no free lunch. In life nothing is for free and the same goes for relationships, they require effort and compromise. Once you know what will make you happy and fulfilled you can’t just demand to have it, you must earn it. Hence your focus should be on what you need to do to earn it.

Step #3: Ask for it.

If you don’t ask, you don’t get. Once you are working on earning what will make you happy and fulfilled, ask the universe to bring it to you. Also when dating or when in a relationship don’t be afraid to ask!

For example, if what is going to fulfill you is creating a family, be upfront and share this while dating. You want to make sure both of you have the same relationship goals so there are no regrets or frustrations later on.

Step #4: Don’t settle until you find it.

If after being open with your significant other about what is going to make you happy and fulfilled, you are still not 100% there, do something about it! This can range from going together to a therapist or a coach to ending the relationship and moving on. Don’t settle no matter how invested you are in the relationship (remember I broke up an engagement because of this). If you don’t look out for your best interest no one will.

Now make sure you follow through and give yourself the love and encouragement you need. Because as Mel Robbins said:

“If you really want to be fulfilled and happy, start by improving the most important relationship that you have. And it’s with the human being you spend your entire life with. The one who’s staring back at you every morning in the mirror.”

You’re worth it.

For follow up questions, examples about these steps, or to go deeper please feel free to attend any of my free events. There you can ask me any question related to being single, relationships, or something unrelated you are going through that might be affecting your dating life.

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Let me know if you found this post helpful. And if you haven’t already, make sure you check out my FREE resources!